10 years ago today I nervously breathed a few breaths alone and looked at my reflection in the mirror. I had my makeup done fancier than I’d ever done before and my hair was curled and pulled back. I walked downstairs and my mom and sisters helped me as I stepped into that big white gown. They tied up the back as a million thoughts raced through my mind. I was more anxious than I’d ever been before. I just wanted to see him.
When we got to the church, I just wanted to walk down the aisle now. I had this urgent feeling to just get going with the ceremony. I remember my Dad asking how I was feeling (while he himself was so sick with food poisoning) and telling him I just wanted to get going. As soon as I saw Marco, every single nervous feeling, every single worry just faded away and many people told me I was beaming as I walked down the aisle. We snuck glances at each other and grinned the entire ceremony and never have I ever wanted to kiss anyone more. Waiting until the end of the service was so hard. But we made it and we were married!
I always wondered and questioned the phrase “when you know, you know.” Until I met Marco. It was the biggest crush I’d ever had and the more I got to know him it just deepened and I fell hard.
I embarrassingly had this mental checklist of what the “perfect” guy for me would be. Some were jokes “a Habs fan would be nice…” “bonus points if he plays volleyball.” “If his eyes are blue and he has dark hair in a goner.” And others more serious, “if he makes me laugh.” “If he challenges me mentally.” “If he makes me feel safe.” And Marco slowly hit every single one without even trying. He has an old soul. He’s traditional and gentleman, but he never treats me as anything less than his equal.
That day, 10 years ago today, I was simply a 23 year old girl who had no idea what she was getting into, only that I was madly in love with a 22 year old boy who’d asked me to spend the rest of my life with him. I can honestly say I’ve never had a single flicker of regret. We’ve been through more financially, business wise, emotionally and personally than most couples go through in 20 years, but I wouldn’t trade any of it for anything different.
It’s without a doubt one of the hardest things I’ve ever done but the best thing I’ve ever done.
I once said that getting married is your one chance to pick your family. I still believe that. Marco is my family. He’s my person. The one I turn to for everything. To share my good news with. To cry to when I’m hurt. He’s the one person in the world who knows me better than anyone else and I love the way he sees me. He’s without a doubt the BEST person I know. He’s honest, hard working, the most loyal person I know…he’ll stand by people long after they’ve stopped deserving it because he sees the good in everyone, he speaks well of everyone, is funny, so kindhearted and a badass businessman. He’s motivated and driven with a passionate Italian heart that I fell so deeply in love with. He puts me and the kids before himself daily and constantly forgets to take time for himself. He’s somehow found a way to strike the perfect balance between humble and confident. He pushes people to do their best and holds them accountable because he sees the potential in those around him and nothing bothers him more than when people sell themselves short. 10 years of marriage isn’t long in the grand scheme of life, but it’s been the best 10 years of my life.
Marriage is a challenge and an adventure rolled into one. It’s the daily choice of love. Love is a feeling but it’s also an action and one that takes time and effort to display. It takes swallowing pride and the need to be right (a minor struggle of mine ????) and compromise on the silliest of things….like the appropriate amount of time to have the dishes done after dinner is done.
It’s seeing each other at our absolute worst and forgiving each other when we act less than loving.
It’s being brave and challenging each other when we aren’t acting our best, and making sure to celebrate and compliment each other’s successes, no matter how small.
It’s listening to how the other person is feeling and acknowledging their feelings as legitimate even when we can’t understand how in the world they could ever feel that way.
It’s getting to fall into the intimate routine of life that only married couples understand and remembering every once and awhile not to take for granted how wonderful that really is!
Marco, thank you so much for the best 10. I love you more than words could ever adequately express and I can’t wait to see what the next 10 bring.